As I type this post out on my Blackberry I gaze at two words in bold above these words-Post Content.
I suppose that’s why I followed the example of a fellow blogger out in Oregon whose name is Storie. She calls her blog The Real Storie, and when I resurected my blog I called mine The Real Daniel. To be real is to have deep and redemptive content to post, and it’s in that vain that Storie and I offer what we offer. God is glorified in that offering, and you our readers are drawn closer to Jesus Christ, the most real One forever.
In Him we live and move and have our being.
I’m pausing this night reflecting on the chronic struggle I have with depression. I was with my daughter tonight at a birthday celebration, and I was sitting at a table listening to a man mistreat a young girl for being homeschooled. When he finished with his ignorant line of questioning he asked the girl if he could grade some of her papers, and I leaned over to her, and I told her not to let him because of his dumb questions. I should have kept my mouth shut. She was doing fine without me.
One problem with my depression is a bi-polar condition that creates an inappropriate amount of anger that flies past my frontal lobe before I realize what I just said or did I should not have said or done. What a “blessing” God has beset me with. It’s a cross.
The homeschool girl left our table, and I thought I’d add something to my little self-righteous monologue. I quote the real daniel.
She’ll be your cardiologist 10 years from now about to cut you open, and she’ll look down at you on the operating table, and say, “Remember me? I’m the homeschool girl.”
I’m so bright my dad calls me son. Nothing could be further from the truth.
I’m pretty sure King David, Joseph and Jesus battled depression. I’m in good company, and even when I write myself off my God is not done with me.
After I said that to him you could cut the tension with a knife. I was right, but being right is wrong sometimes, and I completely crossed the line.
I was getting on to my daughter for “crossing the line” moments earlier, and there I was guilty through and through of the very thing I was trying to sell my daughter on. Long sigh as I draw in some coffee and Kahlua.
Thank you Hillsong United for reminding me again for the thousandth time that He does indeed hold me now.
Here I stand arms opened wide…-Hillsong United
Your prayers are always welcomed. I love you each and every one even when I’m a jerk.
